Graduated from college at the age of 20 as the sole recipient of the Most Outstanding Senior award – the top award for one graduating student
Earned Ph.D. at the age of 26
Received several student and career awards and recognition
Inaugural Dean of Students of an innovative educational model known to be the first of its kind in the nation
Named Distinguished Alumni by alma mater
Recognized as top 40 Under 40 leader in Central Florida
This is a sample of some of the accomplishments that I’m grateful to have achieved thus far. By the world's standards, you'd probably say that I'm a pretty accomplished, young, African American woman with a "good head on my shoulders" and a bright future ahead. That's true 😏, but the standards I use to measure success are a bit different than a list of achievements. I didn't always have this level of understanding, but circumstances in life (like the death of both my parents) significantly changed my perspective. In short, my accomplishments in public are a distant second to what is most important for me to achieve in private.
My primary measures of success are based on questions like:
How connected am I to God?
How strong is my relationship with my husband?
How present, loving, and supportive am I to my two children?
How have I helped, served, and inspired others?
Am I at peace with who I am and who I am becoming?
Society has led us to believe that peace, success, and fulfillment come from the things we possess; money, power, and influence we gain; and the number of likes on our social media pages. As a young professional, I understand your strong desire to make an impact and leave a lasting legacy. The unfortunate part is that too much of an imbalanced focus on this often results in working longer hours, lacking sufficient rest, spending less time with the ones you love, and experiencing high levels of stress and anxiety – only to remain restless and discontent.
Well, I say NOT SO! You don’t have to be a victim of this “professional faux pas” because it can be a very costly mistake. I’m sure you don’t want to look back over your life in regret wishing that you’d done it all differently. True peace and personal wholeness belong to you (John 14:27), but you've got to be bold enough to prioritize what’s important.
Tomorrow is not promised, and it’s not too late to change your course. Start now!
Learn to say, "No." (Notice how "No." is a complete sentence.) Stop over accommodating to climb the "ladder of success" because it can lead to an imbalance of your work and personal lives and increase stress. (Trust me, I know!) The Bible says to seek God first, and He’ll add everything else you need. He'll establish the work of your hands (give you success) and cause you to have good results if you allow him to chart your path instead of trying to do it on your own. Trust Him to do that.
Focus on WHO, not WHAT: WHO you want to be is much more important than WHAT you want to be. Your job is not who you are; it’s what you do. You are not your title, awards, achievements, fears, or failures. You are a uniquely designed individual with a purpose on this earth. Work on clarifying who you are (detached from your occupation), and your WHO will begin to align with your WHAT.
Prioritize Relationships: Your legacy will be less about what you’ve accomplished, and more about who you were, how you gave, and how you loved. Put your career in its place and prioritize relationships with those you care about. That email and project can wait!
Live with greater intentionality one decision at a time. Balance your need to succeed in your career with your drive to thrive in personal wholeness to truly live richly every day.
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